A Window Away

I looked out of the window and saw a little boy
He gave me a weak smile.
His tattered rags tearing against my cashmere
His tear-stained helpless eyes that bore into my suspicious, interrogating pair
His famished, fragile body nervous before my healthy one that I was too conscious of.
We belonged to two different worlds,
All I had to do was smile back.

Bengal Tiger

Tonight I saw myself for the first time.
With long, undulating caramel colored hair.
An off white cotton pajama dress with small pink flowers dancing about me
I saw my face.
My sparkling almond shaped eyes that looked up at him
I saw the courage and determination in my heart
The willingness to love what I could not understand.
Tonight I accept what happened. I accept that it did happen.
I welcome this courageous being who has held her secret for so long.
I hear myself growl a warning at him.
So he knows
I’m no longer alone
This is my house now.

Ebb and Flow

It’s been happening since you were four…
And every time, I force myself to see the silver lining
To twist the situation and absorb the sadness into my pleasure.
Whenever you are feeling anxious, worried, overwhelmed or out of control,
You snuggle closer, hold on tighter…
You are speaking my love language and
My heart and soul soak up every second of it
And give it back to you tenfold.
Yet I also know that this closeness at nighttime snuggle
Is a sign of insecurity
As you make your way slowly out into the world in your first 18 years.
The steps out into independence are solid at times
And tentative at others, sometimes even easing back…
At those times, you want to snuggle tighter
Seeking reassurance that we are here
Reassurance that the scary world is surmountable with love behind you.