Elderhood

By Mary Lu Everett

Thinking about elderhood makes me look back a bit and try to remember my life’s passage from when I was born, and to my children and grandchildren along the way and where I will go from here now that I will be 80 years old soon.

What is life’s passage other than following it along the way. It feels that there is no looking back from here or trying to guess what my future will look like.

I will be 80 years old soon and I anticipate that as long as I am alive I will be enjoying my future and not necessarily looking back at my distant past.

I am happier now than when I was younger- two many responsibilities- my first husband leaving me to raise 3 children on my own; my going to law school and becoming a lawyer and deciding after 15 years that I didn’t want to spend my time doing that. When I remarried I was happier.  I had someone who I could count on. 

The age of humility- when I have grandchildren.  I love my grandchildren- and am watching them grow up.  I babysit.  I watch my son and daughters getting older.  They watch me too and don’t like what they see all the time.  They try to protect me and I pretend I don’t need that- they are too busy.

When I fall – they say “really Mom?”  Am I going to have to watch you all the time too? And actually this hits home.  Why should my children have to watch me as I get older and do “dumb” things.

Yes I will watch the babies and yes I won’t try to lift them as I play patty cake or ring around the rosy.  And yes, I will be more careful so you can live your life and see what it is like and love your little ones and laugh when they start to call me “Grammy Lu” and run up to me with their books and sit on the couch with me to oh and awe and mean it.

I am already polishing up my Wills and Trusts so the next generation will know my intentions.

I am being quite careful when I walk down the street near our home- no falls, no quick steps- just exercise.  I work out at the gym with someone and that helps me get stronger or at least last a little longer…