14 March 24 write
By Jan Dederick
Memories of elder women of past years.
Jo, next door neighbor, who complained that,
at 68, she needs to rest after only a very
short stint of yard work. She chided us, newly moved in
to ‘keep after the sour grass! It will take over!’
Many the winter I strove to keep that sour grass
at bay. It never worked, but I wanted to be
a good neighbor, a good girl. My remit in life.
Jo moved to senior housing in 2000; my new
neighbor didn’t know squat about the dangers
of sour grass.
Another elder friend, more recent,
shared after an absence that she could ‘only
schedule one thing a day, then I’m done!’
Oh how I can relate to these two crones. Oh how
I long to come to peace with this need to lie down,
to embrace the sands running down as something
other than failure. As life’s head nodding
‘Yes, dear, well done. See all you’ve created.
It’s okay to rest, for the rest of the time.’
The sour grass was here before you, and will be here after.
Jan Dederick
Born November 23, 1946
At 25, I was a Montessori preschool teacher in Cambridge, MA. I adored Montessori, adored those children, saw what magic was possible.
Advice? Keep on listening to that voice inside your head, sweetie, keep on listening to that Sadie. You’re doing great! Even though you don’t know that yet.
Karen Hunt - April 18, 2024 @ 12:03 pm
I had never seen sour grass until I moved to California 34 years ago. Even the “weeds” are beautiful in California. We should embrace them along with the “sands running down.” I enjoyed reading your poem while resting after the dreaded trip to the gym. It helped me feel at peace with the need to lie down. Thank you.
David Schweidel - April 14, 2024 @ 4:42 pm
The feeling really comes through here – lovely! Thanks!
Penny Schultz - April 11, 2024 @ 11:56 am
The stunning truth is our need and yet aversion “to embrace the sands running down as something other than failure”! Anyone past 70 recognizes this! Thank you Jan Dederick for naming it so honestly and beautifully!
Mardith - April 10, 2024 @ 12:35 am
I am with the 3 people who referred to the lines about coming to peace, though I don’t know I have much hope. I also loved the sour grass and your neighbors.
Carl - April 8, 2024 @ 8:42 pm
“”to embrace the sands running down as something other than failure”. To find a line ( a truth) like that in a poem is the reason I read poetry. Beautiful,
beautiful wise poem.
Daniel Danzig - April 6, 2024 @ 6:17 pm
Delightful. How we all long to come to peace with our aging selves.
Martina Reaves - April 6, 2024 @ 7:36 am
Oh, my, what a poem.
This line is just a winner: ” Oh how
I long to come to peace with this need to lie down,
to embrace the sands running down as something
other than failure.”