Einstein In Passing
By Carl Kopman
If Einstein was right in my misunderstanding of e=mc squared, and if Freud was right in my misunderstanding of myself, and if my mother was right when she said, “ Get moving! What do you think… time is standing standing still for you…,” well then, at my age, that means I am at a point of multi-dimensional, double-helixed, mobiusly-looped, DNA deja vu where I have never been, will be again, and never really was.
A little confusing? Sure! But just imagine all these experiences, memories, and aspirations that you and I share and don’t share, just imagine them as commonalities of universal knowledge unknowingly looping in and out of a hodgepodge of deja vus or deja vuses…,well then… this is how time passes, an intermingling of all these deja views finally creating an agreed upon yet ever-changing reality.
“ I never thought it could get that complicated, young man,” Einstein called with a gentle wave of his recombinant tail. “I meant it as a simple theory, I think you are making it more complex than it needs to be.”
“Of course he is, Albert. He’s confused. He’s dreaming,” opined a goateed little Sigmund mounted on the guilt-ridden back of a Freuden Sperm swimming upstream.
“So, this is how he passes his time…,” mother said. “For this he went to college.”
“ Actually, Mrs…,” Einstein called disappearing into the present. “We don’t pass time, it passes us…. I think.”
“So that’s how it works,” I said pulling my head from the primordial preoccupation of my therapist’s couch. “Time passes us and the moment of passing is the present!”
“How do you feel about that,” my therapist asked as she escorted an enlightened me to the door of her office at exactly 9:51am; demonstrating that while time can neither be created nor destroyed, it may be transformed into a fifty minute hour.
But of course that is another story for another time which, if I am correct in my amalgam of reasons, I have written before, will write again, but never really wrote.